July 01, 2002
Mental Chatter

The Voices have been talking to me. I know, when I retreat it usually means that things arent going well. What it means right now is that I'm stressed at work and would rather retreat into good gaming and writing. And at least those are healthier than food. Ice cream is one of my staples these days, I'll admit, but I'm sticking to my diet.

Instead of focussing on food, I'm letting the Voices come out. Maybe I'm working on developing a new one for work. If I am, I don't know what her name is yet. Not to mention her personality.

Because Laurie's been invoked recently, I've just posted an excerpt from one of his stories to The Voices section. He's been talking to me. I'm not sure yet what he's saying. A part of me suddenly craves running World of Darkness again so I can use him. Dunno... since WEF will be going away, I will be utterly without FTF gaming for a while. So I guess it would be somewhat good to do a game. I'm just not sure how, or when.

Writing is definitely more healthy physically than eating. Mentally, I'm not so sure. No, no, I'm not going insane. I'm never going to slip over that edge fully into the world of fantasy. But its nice to slip there on occasion and let the little voices in my head rule my fingertips while I type.

The irony of this is, of course, that I am at my most creative when I have the least time and ability to do anything about it. I want to retreat, so the voices give me a place to go. But I don't have *time* to retreat. I have so much to do at work (I should be working tonight, but I keep resisting -- I did do so for about a half an hour).

I suppose its a combination avoidance tactic and mental refreshment. Whatever it is, my timing sucks. But its always this way.

Posted by Deb Atwood at July 01, 2002 10:06 PM | TrackBack
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