July 26, 2002
Thoughts...

Its been a long day, but remarkably peaceful. At least, in some meaning of the word, I suppose.

The night was interrupted one more time, when Ry woke up at 4:15 or so. I gave him a bottle, and he drank about 3 ounces that time, and I had him back in bed by 5am or so. But then I turned off my alarm... it'd been a bad enough week and all that I figured I could get in a little late since well, I hadn't exactly slept much all night. I wanted to make sure I could safely arrive if I drove. *wry smiles*

I finally got up around 7am (only an hour late). Kev helped me get Dani up and in motion, getting ready to go to school. I made it into work not too late, so it was okay.

And the day was much more peaceful than they have been lately. I managed to mostly lock myself in my corner and get some things done. I lost my voice throughout the day, and well, found out that I've been looking as strung out as I've felt with all the stress and exhaustion. So I made arrangements to take Friday as a personal day, rather than trying to work at home while taking care of Ryan. I needed the assurance that I wasn't going to have to try to get 8 hours of work in while he was sick and while errands needed to be run. And its a load off my mind to know I can relax a little.

Even the evening wasn't too bad. Some tough times as his temperature rose and rose again after 8pm, but we couldn't give him more motrin until 9ish. But once we did, Kevin got him to lie down for bed. He just got up and drank a good amount of formula, and he's still blessedly cool. I'm hoping that maybe it means the fever broke, but I'm being cynical and figuring it hasn't. If it hasn't, I'm calling the dr. I know there's nothing they can do if its a virus, but I'm looking for advice I guess. Poor kid. I feel like such a failure because I can't fix it.

That's one of the hardest things about being a parent -- when your child looks at you with that bewildered why is this happening to me and can't you fix it mommy expression, and the answer is no, you can't. *groans*

So anyway, now that he's tucked back into his crib, and he seems to be sleeping well enough, if snoring noisily, I am going to go back to bed. And in the morning maybe I can figure out what's gone wrong with my CD burner -- it won't read CDs particularly well, and it keeps failing on burn. *groans* And I've got a CD I've just *got* to get burned tomorrow. It'd be no big if I were going to work -- I'd drop the files onto the laptop and burn them in the office. But with staying home, I've got to find a way to do it here. Stupid hardware.

Posted by Deb Atwood at July 26, 2002 01:19 AM | TrackBack
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