January 13, 2003
Is it a full moon?

Okay, I've gotta start tracking things better. I'm turning into bitch from hell today, and even though I *swear* I've got reason to be pissy about the things I'm pissy about, it seems like I'm going overboard. Which is usually a herald of things to come.

But still... I don't think I was entirely unreasonable.

Mondays are gymnastics day. I leave at 4:45 in order to pick up Dani early and get her to her class enough before 6 that we have time to get a dawdling almost 5 year old inside, shoes & socks off and put away, and a pit stop all before going out on the floor. So I'm getting onto route 90 so I can speed down the highway towards daycare, and I'm driving Kev's car so everything's just a tad unfamiliar, and my pocket starts ringing.

Well, too bad. My phone's in my pocket, and with two layers of outerwear over it, plus nicely molded seats that mean I have to be a gymnast myself to get to the phone, not to mention the lack of a hands-free device since I'm not in my own car... this all meant, not answering.

About five minutes later, still on route 90, still under the same exact conditions except now I'm off the entrance ramp and going a good bit faster, the phone rings AGAIN.

Finally, I'm almost to daycare. Unless its work, the phone has to be Kevin. So I figure I'll call him when I get there before I go in to get Danielle. And while I'm stopped at the light just before turning down the street to get to daycare, it rings yet AGAIN.

Three times in about ten minutes. Tops. I figure its important, so I go through the contortions required to get the bloody phone out of my pocket and answer it, sans hands-free device. I tell him I'm still on the road, and without device, can I call him back in a couple of minutes?

And you wanna know what's so important that it can't wait? Dinner.

*heavy groans* I ended up putting the phone down so I could manage to turn the two necessary corners and shift at the same time. I called back when I got to daycare.

But was I unreasonable? I figured it had to be an emergency to call that many times when he must've realized I couldn't answer it for some reason. I mean, he knew I'd call back. I always do. And I told him I couldn't talk, but he made it sound urgent still, and then it was dinner.

Yeah, when you're married, sometimes the fights come over really silly things. Especially when everyone's overtired, and overworked, and there's just too much stress going around.

Dani got herself punished this evening, too. No book tomorrow night. I may change that to no card game -- I'd rather read to her because I so want her to learn to love books as much as we do.

What was her offense? She has a really bad habit of saying "SAWWWREEEE" in an exceedingly sarcastic tone that means that she isn't really sorry, not one bit. And then she apologizes when yelled at, and still doesn't sound apologetic at all. Today, I asked her to hurry up and move things so I could get her buckled in and get out of the way of the huge van that wanted to get by and might take off the car door while doing it. She knows the importance of not leaving the door hanging open. But instead, she started laughing. I said it wasn't funny, mommy could get hurt, and she laughed harder. Then the "SAWWWREEEE". And I flipped. She now knows that she doesn't get to apologize for that attitude. She says sorry in that way and she gets punished -- its mean and cruel and doesn't actually say she's sorry. And its not funny.

Being a parent is a bitch sometimes.

Or is that *I'm* a bitch sometimes.

Probably both. *sighs*

Posted by Deb Atwood at January 13, 2003 10:18 PM | TrackBack
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