September 30, 2003

Yahoo IM won't let me log in with Trillian. It either fails, or bombs Trillian. I supposed I should go check the Trillian website, huh?

On the other hand, Eudora 6 is REALLY nice. I like it a lot, and I love the spam filter!

Posted by Deb Atwood at 08:08 PM
September 29, 2003
Smart kid!

Dani is just incredibly smart. Yes, I'm biased. But here she is, barely in kindergarten, and she is sitting with a first/second grade math book doing math problems. She is doing addition all by herself, and except for writing a few numbers backwards, she's getting them right. Without help. And for fun!

Damn. I'm impressed. I hope she can keep this zest for learning for the rest of her life!

Posted by Deb Atwood at 07:01 PM
Struggling to stay awake

Had trouble sleeping last night. My right arm is driving me nuts... feels like a rubber band popping right at the inner side of the bend in my elbow. Gotta love the fibro. I need to put heat on my shoulder tonight, and reduce some of the inflammation so that I don't have this problem tonight.

So I didn't get all that much sleep, and today I feel like I am sleepwalking. Putting me in a far more introspective mood than is healthy for work.

On the other hand, I finished IR (YAY!) and am working on specs for some things that need to be finished up. I have to split my attention this week between staging (3 to do today) and specs (one really important one for P3 still to do) and new non-P3 projects. However, it is interesting stuff at least.

If only I can stay awake.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 09:56 AM
September 28, 2003
Long weekend

It was around 7ish or 8ish or so when I turned to Nigel last night and commented that it was one of those days where it was hard to believe that he had only picked me up to go to Jersey that morning. That I had woken up at 6am to the sound of Ryan playing with his toys, and then 14 hours later was wandering around a sculpture garden, trying to get cool in very hot and humid weather.

Sometimes it seems so surreal to take time away from my family. I hear children and I look for mine. There is a touch on my shoulder and I expect to see Kevin. And then I realize that I am actually on my own... just me. And I am surprised by it.

But now, I'm exhausted. I'm probably off for bed relatively soon, because despite getting my usual 6 hrs of sleep, I am somehow more tired than usual. I really needed to sleep later, but woke up horridly dehydrated. I didn't get near enough to drink yesterday. Nor today. It's going to be a rough (and puffy) day tomorrow.

Back to the grind, back to the routine. Or what amounts to one in our household. Switching schedules with Kev tomorroe, so I'm in late but can work late. Shopping on the way home. Need to figure out what's happening when this week.

Need to make arrangements to get NIgel over for dinner regularly again. Realized that I do miss that -- it was fun heckling Survivor and watching CSI. This week is likely out (family haircut scheduled) although we could certainly do it afterwards. After all, Kev and I will still be watching TV anyway, right?

I think it's going to be a long week. We'll all survive it. *smiles*

[Listening to: The Rain Within Her Hands - Bella Morte - Dive (05:06)]

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:16 PM
September 26, 2003

Whee! I have tickets for the concert at the Palace theater next week -- Mary Chapin Carpenter, Shawn Colvin, Dar Williams, and Patty Griffin. Me and Josh and Liz are going. This'll be COOL! Kev's taking on the kids (and gymnastics that night, poor guy). I'm REALLY looking forward to this.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 02:59 PM
The fun of school fundraising

*sighs* One of the problems with Danielle reaching the age of school is that she has now also reached the age of enforced fundraising. There is little that makes me feel more guilty than walking up to someone I know at work and trying to convince them to buy something.

Admittedly, the things are okay. We've got raffle tickets (need to sell $50 worth) and we've got cards and wrapping paper and chocolate and nicknacks. It's just, I hate asking. And the kids aren't allowed to go door to door (the world has changed... I remember singing songs and talking in British accents (no, I don't remember WHY the accents) while selling oranges & grapefruits for choir with my friend CJ in high school. We went out for HOURS and canvassed all up and down Speen St. Had a great time. I remember doing it as a Brownie to sell cookies. But things are different now, and fundraising really means having the parents bring the stuff into work and try to convince people to buy it.

Didn't I do my time already? *sighs*

Posted by Deb Atwood at 01:56 PM
September 25, 2003
Trying to be organized

Okay, dinner's in the crockpot. Let's hope today isn't a repeat of Tuesday, on which I intended to work late and got a call from Kevin desperate to have me pick up the kids (and then he got to leave on time after all *rolls eyes*). I need to work late tonight, see if I can get everything as far as humanly possible in IR. It's due tomorrow. Gods. I can make it. I really can. But sometimes I'm not so sure.

With any luck, dinner will be good. Sauteed up sausage last night and stuck it in the fridge. Dumped that and a bunch of different types of canned tomatoes, plus one chopped onion and about 4 cloves of garlic, into the crockpot along with appropriate seasonings. We only need to make up the pasta (and wow, the pot's clean! the KITCHEN is clean!) and dinner's on the table. Quick and simple and easy.

I've almost made it through one week with the kitchen staying clean and the eating being done. With any luck, I can keep it up next week.

Have to do laundry tonight, which'll throw me off. But I've got enough school uniforms for Dani to wear to the three non-gym days. But today, a gym day, she had to wear her uniform because of school pictures (she'll be SO cute *smiles*). Which means laundry tonight! Whee. *rolls eyes*

Posted by Deb Atwood at 09:07 AM
September 24, 2003
Laughing too hard to eat

I hadn't seen this page before...

Designing your team the Scooby way

Thanks to ambersknave.

Now I can't stop trying to figure out how to map the cast of RoP to Scooby. Rhiannon's the Shaggy. Definitely. Any thoughts from the peanut gallery??

[Listening to: Visions - Metric - Blue (06:17)]

Posted by Deb Atwood at 12:27 PM
September 23, 2003

Sitting here, staring at the screen with a crooked little fond grin.

[Listening to: let me in.wav - Kate Barclay - Krull (06:17)]
Posted by Deb Atwood at 09:49 PM
Public Apologies

Apologies to everyone to whom I've been a bitch lately.

Apologies to everyone for not being there when you needed me.

Apologies to everyone I've said I would do something for, then never did.

Apologies to everyone who I've forgotten to call, write, or just say how much I cared.

Apologies for every responsibility I've screwed up on.

Apologies to my children for reacting with crankiness and stress.

Apologies to myself for forgetting who I am. And how to be me.

Apologies to everyone for inconsistencies.

Apologies to my husband for snapping instead of being supportive.

Apologies to my husband for thinking that what I need wins over what you need.

And apologies in general... because I cannot remember everything, and that is a large part of the whole problem. I cannot be everything I want to be, or am supposed to be, or promised to be. Would that my mistakes were small and non-affecting, but I know I've hurt people deeply.

And I'm sorry.

[Listening to: Ob La Di - Save Ferris - DEMO (03:47)]
Posted by Deb Atwood at 08:04 PM
Maybe if I think positively enough

Sore throat's been increasing since this morning. Then again, it's raining. So I'm just going to assume that this is my sinuses and allergies reacting to a weather front moving through. I am not allowed to get sick. There is simply no time.

On the other hand, the weather is stormy and rainy and much more intense in some ways than the hurricane was. At least rainwise. The clouds are nowhere near as beautiful though. Just a simple wash of gray splashed across the sky, dumping bucketloads of water with heavy winds.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 08:51 AM
September 22, 2003
Raising standards

I just put a video on for Ryan -- taped at low quality on VHS off of PBS back when Dani was little. Teletubbies for his entertainment. (So I can get some work done)

And I'm looking at it and all I can think is how amazingly fuzzy it is. I have become spoiled by Tivo and the quality of digital cable and digital recording. This seems substandard.

And I wonder what it would be like if I put in one of my old tapes recorded on a normal TV with no cable, just antenna reception, and if I could even stand to look at it anymore.

It used to be easier to tune out the fuzziness and see beyond. But I am so used to decent quality now that I cannot suspend my frustration enough to watch it. Still, for the sake of Ryan being quiet, I am willing to put up with the faint buzz. *sighs* It means I can get work done!

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:46 AM
Communication Breakdown

Trying to converse with a two year old is like trying to understand Greek when you've got only the absolute guess what the sounds might mean. Worse yet, he's opinionated. So if I *don't* understand him, he gets frustrated and just starts yelling it loudly, like maybe I'm deaf and I'll figure it out if he just keeps trying.

It's kind of funny sometimes. He's got tons of new words -- so many I almost can't keep up with him. "Do-tee" is donut. "I don' wan' that" is a common phrase as of this weekend.

"Mommy!" in very loud tones is very common. Along with "Daddy!" Also "Where's Sissy?" I wonder if she'll regret telling him to call her that when she's sixteen?

Posted by Deb Atwood at 07:40 AM
September 21, 2003
Recipe -- Oriental Smoked Tenderloin

This came out so absolutely yummy I just have to share. I only tasted a bit of it, since was the one that I made for tomorrow night, really, but the mix of flavors worked out perfectly.

Oriental Smoked Tenderloin

1 cup low sodium soy sauce
1 Tbsp sesame oil
1 heaping tsp crushed ginger
1 heaping Tbsp minced garlic
1 pork tenderloin (~12 oz)

Mix the first four ingredients together in a bag and then add the tenderloin. Put in the fridge to marinate a couple of hours.

Soak 2-3 handfuls (depending on the size of your hand) of mesquite chips in water for an hour. Make a smoking packet (long and thin about the length of the grill, double layer of foil, holes poked in the top) and place in the grill. Once it is good and smoky, put the tenderloin on with the grill as low heat as it will go, over indirect heat.

Let smoke for about 45 minutes. Put a thermometer in to check, flip, and go for about 15 more minutes.

Let rest, then slice and enjoy...

The mix of the smoke with the marinade was a surprisingly wonderful taste. I wasn't sure how it was going to be to smoke the oriental flavoring but I am SO glad I did and am writing it down so I don't forget *what* I did. Especially since it was such a simple thing to put together! I could do this one easily into the marinade before I leave in the morning, then throw on the smoker at night in order to cook it up for the next night. The only thing that makes it not a quick meal is having to soak the chips first, and supposedly they REALLY only need a half hour (we've had better results with a full 60 minutes).

[Listening to: What A Feeling - Heather Nova - Siren (04:46)]
Posted by Deb Atwood at 06:53 PM

Okay, so now I'm dehydrated. I can feel it, and I'm sweating which only makes it worse.

On the other hand, cleaning the dining room HAD to count for exercise. I had to work hard at that.

BUT... the dining room has been excavated out from under most of the piles of crap and tonight we can manage to eat as a family. That's assuming I get the pork tenderloins defrosted and smoked, and the white rice and veg and everything done. Kev's finishing up the kitchen now.

Gods willing we can keep this up.

We are desperate to find something we can keep under control. Some days it seems like everything is falling apart, no matter what we do. Which only makes it worse.

Speaking of control, Kev has said he will buy me cute sexy clothes if I can manage a body to go with them. Incentive. That along with daydreaming of a tattoo, more ear piercings, and the mental image of walking into a room and seeing people go "wow". None of which is likely to happen as long as I find myself snacking, or not having a kitchen or any consistency in my eating.

I've got things planned through Tuesday so far. Tonight is smoked pork tenderloin, white rice, and some sort of a veg (tbd). Tomorrow is fried rice, using the leftovers from the rice and pork. Tuesday is a pot roast (the roast is already in the fridge to defrost). That way I can swap schedules with Kev and come home late on Tuesday but food will not be a huge deal. Otherwise it'd be takeout time. Which is how far too much of the summer... hells, the past year... has gone.

[Listening to: Thank You - Sister Hazel - Fortress (03:21)]

Posted by Deb Atwood at 02:55 PM
On the list for the day

There are so many choices of things to do...

Like work on IR.
Like clean the dining room.
Like the program book for Albacon.
Like ramble more on LJ about gaming meta-topics.
Like email.
Like write (400 words last night... need to do another 2000 before the chapter's over).
Like read.
Like laundry.
Like relax.

Gods that last one would be nice. *smiles*

I think Albacon and the rambling mixed are what's getting done now. IR can wait until later. And the dining room will be done in an hour or so, when Kevin and I have both put some time into other things. I'm just not up for it yet. I'll work on defrosting dinner and getting ready to smoke a couple of pork tenderloins then too.

Our goal is to eat dinner as a family in the dining room. It's been a while since we have. Life has been tearing everything apart and it is time we re-exerted some small measure of control.

Laundry... that's just a constant. Gotta go check on it every so often since the washer doesn't work quite right. So it takes a good deal more paying attention and babysitting than I'd like. But well, at least I can do other things in between times.

With any luck, it can be a productive day. I think that all depends on how long the kidlets stay snoozy.

[Listening to: Sunny Day - Leah Andreone - alchemy (04:07)]

Posted by Deb Atwood at 01:13 PM
I knew him when

Wow. Just got an email from my mom including this URL to our hometown newspaper:

Natick Son Wins Emmy

Why is this interesting? I went to school with Loni. He was a freshman when I was a senior in high school, and he was one of the two freshman who came to Boskone as a part of our HUGE loosely chaperoned group that year. I remember him. I noticed when he started doing effects for Buffy -- it's pretty cool to see the name of someone you knew once in the credits. And now... wow.

I knew him when.

[Listening to: Sunny Day - Leah Andreone - alchemy (04:07)]

Posted by Deb Atwood at 01:08 PM
September 20, 2003
Update on the Illness front

Well, this morning, after listening to an all-too-hoarse Ryan whimper until 1 am or so, I decided I had to do the paranoid mommy thing and take him to the doctor. Kevin thought I was being silly (as usual) but I didn't want to go through hell again tonight without knowing why. It could just be a virus (there's a croup type thing going around, but Ry's not coughing much). Or it could be his ears again, or his throat.

The doctor took a look at him and didn't think it was going to be anything serious, but did the culture.

And Ry's got strep.


So, this means the chances of the rest of the family getting strep are good. I've already got a sore throat, but I'm letting it go another day before I get checked out, because mine might just be normal allergies. I've also got to make some phone calls and let people KNOW that he has strep, because he may have already given it away last Thursday. Urgh. I suspect the next few days/weeks aren't going to be good around here. We've got different sicknesses in our house than Audrey has in hers, and between three daycares/schools and spending a lot of time together, I think it'll be a bit before it all plays through. Ick.

He's had his first antibiotic dose and is resting now. Me, I'm going to go clean the kitchen and see how far I can get there. Then time to work again... I've got a lot of work still to do this weekend. I managed to get some done last night, and got to a good point in my code, but I've got some significant debugging left to do. The sooner it gets done, the better.

It's going to be a long weekend. And not in the good way.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 12:59 PM
September 19, 2003
poor Boo

Ry's sick, poor kid. He's been kinda snuffly for a while, and tonight he's just miserable. So I checked his temp, and it's almost 101. So I dosed him up on acetominephin and hopefully he'll sleep more easily. Both of Audrey's kids have been sick, and Kev (although no fever there) this week, so this isn't entirely surprising. Dani'll probably get it too before too much longer.

The hard part is that Dani's fever -- the nastily high one -- has really scarred me. I don't want to go to sleep now -- I'm half afraid that if I don't check him again soon, it might suddenly spike up to horrifying levels like Dani's did a couple months ago. The mere thought terrifies me.

Like Kevin said afterwards, am I going to be afraid for every little fever they get now?

I guess the answer is yes. They are my babies.

[Listening to: Distance - Not So Much - Pop Goes the World (03:22)]

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:22 PM

The day is beautiful now. Sunny and bright, and almost cloudless. The temperature went up to 80, a good five degrees higher than expected (I'm glad Dani selected a short sleeve shirt, I guess!).

The wind is strong and brisk and wonderful. I had to walk to lunch today and I truly enjoyed it. Bracing. The sort of weather I love. Still full of energy and potential (makes me sound like a windmill, doesn't it?).

It is eerie, though, hearing the wind while sitting here on the fifth floor of the building. When the wind blows, the windows creak and groan, like the building shifts and dances with every movement of air. Sometimes, in strong winds, the sound overshadows the other building noises (even the random shuddering of the building floor which happens at odd moments).

Posted by Deb Atwood at 04:06 PM

It is just amazing out. The sky shifts and changes from blue and sunny with puffy white clouds... then a swath of charcoal watercolor sweeps across my vision, segueing into dots of ink dipped cotton balls spread behind the Albany skyline. And in the middle of it all, a rainbow slips from sky to earth, brightening as I drive towards it and then finally disappearing altogether as I take the Madison Avenue exit and the angle is wrong.

The crackling feel of expectation as the wind blows has me on edge. I want to dance, I want to run. I want to be outside when the rain comes and feel it pounding down on top of me.

I'm generally afraid of every life threatening storm known to man. Except for hurricanes. Gods, right now I just feel ALIVE.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 07:46 AM
September 18, 2003

Dara isn't the only one who babbles, a fact which my boss reminded me of today. It was funny, tho.

He was describing a scene in an episode of DS9 that he saw last night. Odo and Sisko are talking, and Odo is describing how he derived who was at fault for something or other. Odo went into details about how this thingy was manufactured only in such and such a place, explaining every step of the deductive process. I had to laugh, since this is very me.

Then he tells the end of the story. Sisko finally interrupts, asking Odo to just cut to the chase and tell him who did it. Odo does, and Sisko says well why couldn't you say that in the first place? And Odo said he had to remind Sisko how good he was.

I don't do it for that reason. At least, I don't think I do.

I like to explain things because I honestly want people to know how I got to a decision. Because if they can understand that, then they can get there themselves the next time.

Needless to say, I end up boring people or confusing them. The confusion is much less when I can draw pictures while I talk. I'm not sure the boredom ever goes away.

So for those who've read Dara's rambles in A Grand Affair, she's not the only one who babbles. Unfortunately, that is the trait she picked up from her player. Pity her. *smiles*

[Listening to: Splashdown - Thunder - Daryl Hall & John Oates - ROCK'N SOUL PART 1 (03:21)]

Posted by Deb Atwood at 11:42 PM
Nice boots

I'm wearing my new boots today. The knee high black leather with 3 inch heels ones. I've got on a black skirt that falls just to the tops of the boots, and it just looks cool. Many many compliments on how well they go together.

It's amazing how new shoes can be just that little kick that makes me smile. Like a new piece of jewelry or something really silly that just makes me say "this is me today". And gods know I can use every little kick I can get.

My favorite quote so far today was when another woman in IT passed me in the hallway, stopped, turned around, and said "You're wearing girl clothes today!" in this incredibly surprised voice. It amused me. I suppose, in retrospect, it is a good thing I'm not easily offended!

It's also funny the associates things get in your head. Like... to me... black leather boots always make me think of m'Lady, whom I miss terribly. Like I said. Nice boots.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 09:18 AM
I musta been tired

Okay, much less bitchy and exhausted today. Still kinda in a funk, but not nearly so bad as earlier this week. It's amazing what a little sleep can do. (And now we begin a new downward spiral which will end in yet another night of sleeping well *smiles*).

But I must've been really out of it last night. This morning Ryan woke up and was crying for his binky. I was ready to roll over when Kevin told me it was my turn. I was like "why?" Apparently, Ryan woke up in the middle of the night and was crying for his binky and *Kevin* got up to fix the problem. I didn't even hear it, didn't move. Wow, I was OUT. I never sleep through things.

Hopefully it was all a good thing. With Isabel moving in, the air has my head and sinuses going nutso. Exceedingly unpleasant. I see a good deal more sleep in my future.

Now if only I can find a realistic report of what sort of weather we'll be expecting up here, and for how long.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 07:32 AM
September 17, 2003
Morpheus ?? Which Of The


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Really? Hm... bet there are a few out there who find this one amusing. *laughs*

Via djinnthespazz.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 11:05 PM
A better end than beginning

Well, the day ends in a better mood than it began, I suppose.

Has it been productive? Depends on which aspect of my life you want to hear about.

Coding was decent. I got results into the database, figured out logic, and I think I'm damned close to being done with that particular agent. Gotta see what comes next after that, other than needing the business units to put some decent data in (I'm testing with crap data at the moment in the test system).

Writing was... non-existent.

Gaming was decent. Wrote moves for the games I'm in, although I need to do another one for Dara. Spoke with another player offline about a side thread for Dara, to keep her distracted (and calm her down some). So that'll be cool... I just need to get that one started, which will involve a long ramble, and I don't think I'm up for it tonight. Dara's main thread with Martin/Merlin/Benedict has ended, and I'm working on transforming that into a log format so I can get it posted. I got the previous logs from Ginger who had already transformed them from posts to coherent text. I'll be sending her this one once it is done. And it's going to be pretty damned long -- 14 pages in Word. Damn.

Family? Well, Audrey worked at home this afternoon because Rachel wasn't feeling well. But she was feeling better lately, although not up for gymnastics. And Kevin was feeling better and was able to pick up Ry so I didn't have to take him to gymnastics and spend an hour chasing him. So we all met for dinner at the little Chinese buffet, which the girls just loved. And it was a relaxing moment of recharge which I so desperately needed. Then Dani and I went to her gymnastics lesson, which went REALLY well tonight. I did some work while watching her, so I even felt productive. And Dani did a very good cartwheel -- she is finally losing her fear of starting to move her feet while she's still moving her hands. She'll be doing so well if she practices. And she is completely comfortable on the beam, just totally at ease, even on the high one. It's pretty cool.

Friends? Well, I've had a lot of revelations about things about myself and my psyche and how I keep screwing up where my friends are concerned. I think I'll keep that bit to myself for the moment. Suffice to say, right now, I'm really not proud of myself, but can't for the life of me figure out how to fix it all. There isn't enough of me to do everything. I'm spread WAY too thin.

Anyway, I've promised myself to get into bed before 11. Preferably by 10:30 but not so sure I'll make that. We'll see.

[Listening to: Make it Last - Stroke 9 - Nasty Little Thoughts (03:58)]

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:12 PM
Programming as a diet aid?

Coding is an obsession... (yes, another one). When I'm coding, I'm focusing very intently on what I'm doing. And I have to sit there until I get it right. Which helps the diet, that's for sure, since I am insisting to myself that I won't go get lunch until I can get this first piece of code running. Although with all the silly mistakes I keep finding, that could be a while.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 11:24 AM
Expansion on a theme

The tired, in a funk, bitchiness is NOT gone.

Kev's home sick. He saved himself this morning by getting out of bed (after he'd gotten Dani up and then promptly gone back to bed without lifting another finger) and helping me get the kids out the door. Since he'd not set an alarm for the morning, so I got up a half hour late, and well, if *I* were sick *I* would have to get up and even take the kids to daycare (been there, done that)... it was a good thing he found his inner mommy. I wasn't happy.

Still not.

I'm being unreasonable today.

I didn't want to go to meetings. So my 8:30 was canceled, I should be happy. But it was canceled because they're going to discuss the same things in the 9:00 am. Which I'm not involved in. So I wonder if I'm going to not know what's going on. But then I think if it's important, they'll call me, and then I get all grouchy at the idea of being interrupted. There's no pleasing me today.

It's going to be a long day. I was an hour late to work because of dropping off kids, and I may have to still leave on time, if not early, because Dani has gymnastics and I don't know if I have to pick up and take Ryan too (I'm going to call Kevin later and try to arrange myself out of that particular hell).

By the time evening comes, my energy will be gone, I'll be unable to sleep (as usual) and down. Add in the introspective bullshit that won't leave me alone in my head and you've got the perfect recipe for the perfect day.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 08:24 AM
September 16, 2003
another downer night

I really have to start sleeping. Spent half the day feeling like I was hungover, without the benefit of having a good drunk the night before. People were talking through 3 hrs of meetings this morning, and the voices kept echoing around inside my head, making me thoroughly nauseous. It was bad.

Why the mess in my head? No sleep and dehydration. Don't know where the latter came from. The former? My husband.

I went to bed last night at 10:30. Didn't get to sleep until 11:30 because Kevin was in the mood to talk because he's all stressed out too (both jobs are driving us nutso... it's better when only one of us is stressed at a time). I passed out finally, and woke up close to 1am because he was up and the TV was on too loud. Stayed up a bit. Convinced him to come back to bed. Slept again and didn't want to get up at 5:30. Late to work. Spent too much time whimpering in the corner, and praying no one wanted a coherent answer from me.

Then came lunch.

The bus left at 11:30. Audrey, me, and Meri drove to Crossgates for our lunch hour to go shoe shopping (and had to endure many "long lunch" comments and teasing for it, when I walked back in with three new shoe boxes). Yes, the shoe shopping was productive. Audrey and I both bought these nice low top, lace up boots (brown AND black). They were on sale, too, so I saved $20 there between the two pairs. Then she found camel heeled shoes while I was paying for my boots. Then we walked down to DSW so I could get the knee high black boots (must wear them with a skirt tomorrow) and Audrey found a pair of navy shoes. Meri, of all of us, showed restraint.

It's funny how good it feels to buy shoes. Yeah, every once in a while I have an actual feminine trait. It's rare, but it does happen.

Managed to get some decent work done on coding IR this afternoon. Finished up my query, and got to run it against actual data (YAY data!). It works beautifully, so I translated it into a stored procedure, and then started adapting the Lotuscript code which calls it. Tomorrow I'll hopefully finish that up and for the first time try importing data into the database. I'm hoping to get the base part of this finished this week, so I can concentrate on how to best reload the back data as my task for next week.

I have to have this done by the 26th. I hope the hurricane doesn't hit too badly this weekend -- I cannot afford to lose power. Too much to do.

And then this evening, Kevin's sick. Tummy bug of some sort. Personally, I think it's stress. He thinks it was the pizza for lunch. Same dif, I say. Anyway, that just put this damper on the evening, then I watched Everwood, which I love, but which is a total cry-fest.

And now, here I sit, my head in a spin. Wanting gaming, because it's catharsis and writing of some kind. Finished the Dara story (and put it up on her site). Should be writing something else. After all, Connie Willis is the GoH for LA in '06. If I wanna win my Hugo and tell my cool Connie Willis anecdote, that'd be the perfect year.

Yeah, like I'm ever gonna win a Hugo. *smile* But the writing style rant, and the my life as a writer / fan / SMOF rant... those are for different posts, and maybe another time. I should probably go find some way to be productive.

Meri's reading my blog. She said the next time I feel like writing and don't have anything to write I should start just writing things down out of my head from work so that I can get it downloaded into someone else's head. It's a thought that would work except that by the time I get this far into introspection my brain is pretty far from work. *chuckles* I'm not sure anything I said would make sense by now!

Posted by Deb Atwood at 09:51 PM
September 15, 2003
I'm SO out of shape

Okay, it's sad when a short walk gives me trouble. But that short walk was an effort, including the hills, and I'm tired now. Vaguely fuzzy too, from the fact that despite antibiotics and allergy meds, my sinuses are still filled and I can't breathe through my nose. Which is annoying when one is exercising.

But still, I got a 30 min walk in, and I feel a little relaxed about it. Hopefully I can manage to start making up that work time in the evenings. *fingers crossed* Need discipline.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 12:46 PM
The infinite cuteness that is my son

So Ryan's annoyed with me. *laughs* You see, he picked out his own breakfast this morning. It seemed entirely reasonable to him. Mommy left this container on the couch -- and it had clear sides and he could see very easily that the container had chocolate in it. Fudge. How yummy for an almost two year old!

I came downstairs from my shower to find my son trying to climb the couch in order to get to the fudge I'd set out to bring into work, screaming "Co-Co!" at the top of his lungs. He just couldn't understand why mommy and daddy got to have containers of fudge to take to work, but no one was giving him any for breakfast.

My son is a chocoholic. *grins*

Posted by Deb Atwood at 11:09 AM
Obsession for the forces of good

Is it possible to turn my obsessiveness into a force of good? Can I convince myself to obsess over food and exercise in such a way that I can FINALLY lose weight?

I look in the mirror and I get depressed. I lose a little weight, I gain it back. I can't seem to find time to exercise without giving everything else up. I could walk at lunch again, which was a really productive thing once upon a time, but with needing to put in 45 hrs a week, minimum, in order to get this stuff done, that just isn't going to happen right now. I need to cram work time into the office time... so I eat at my desk and just deal.

Cooking would help. Just paying attention to what I eat and when I eat it. Keeping the kitchen spotless so it attracts my attention. Food shopping on a more normal basis than $20 every day or so (reconciling the bills for the past month was an eye opener with regards to bad food shopping habits). Menu planning.

I can't seem to figure out how other people do it. And they say it's so easy to come home, get a meal on the table, and have the kids and everyone else all sit down at the same time to eat. Hells, I don't even have a table available that we can all fit at.

Yeah, I'm grousing. I'm eating my lemon yoghurt with cereal and I have a cup of decaf coffee mixed with sugar free cocoa (a treat this morning). And there's the fudge in the fridge that I have to pretend isn't there and hope everyone else eats it. *fingers crossed* If I send out that email, it should go. And maybe I can have one piece later today. When the chocolate fit is upon me.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 07:58 AM
September 14, 2003

Okay, I just made the world's easiest Dark Chocolate Fudge recipe.

1 can sweetened condensed milk (NOT evaporated)
3 cups chocolate chips (1 1/2 bags)
pinch salt
1 1/2 tsp vanilla

Line a 8 or 9 inch square pan with foil.

Melt the first three ingredients together over low-medium heat in a heavy saucepan. Stir often because chocolate WILL burn if you're not careful. As soon as it all comes together, remove from the heat and stir in the vanilla.

Spread in the prepared pan and refridgerate 2 hours at least. Turn out onto a cutting board and cut into pieces. Makes about 2 lbs.

So tomorrow I'll have to chop it up and send a little off with Kevin to his work and bring the rest into FAC.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 08:21 PM
I think I've got the split

Not that I could explain it to anyone. But I seem to know where to go when I want to post. Of course, I'm probably deluding myself that some posts belong here and some belong on LJ. *shrugs* It's only been 24 hrs.

Feeling a tad less bitchy now. Tad less. There's something still tweaked in my head, which means I'm on a low end mood swing. Which also means I should crawl into a corner and just stay there, reminding people not to poke me unless they've got a really long stick and I can't reach them with my claws. BUT... that's not being a good mom or wife, so it's just about time to leave the retreat and head back downstairs.

I got the checking account balanced, which is good. When FAC transitioned it's retail business out to clear through another firm, my account went with it. I haven't balanced since then because things didn't go well for me (I got caught up in a miscoded handful of accounts which took a bit longer to transfer). So I just did what I always do with difficult things and avoided the whole topic.

Which means it hit a desperate state. I started balancing earlier this week. Figured out what I could and couldn't do and what information I needed. Got that information after getting as far as I could. And today I finished and it all balances. Through the end of the last statement, and close enough for the rest of it. *phew* Tonight I write all the outstanding checks. But that can wait.

Bizarrely enough, balancing the checkbook has had a settling effect on my head. I'm not really in a good zone for dealing with frustration, but I'm a bit more controlled. I can handle the kids now. Both of whom are severely clingy. I can handle that I've still got piles of laundry to do and a kitchen that looks like a pit.

I wanna bake tonight. I've gotta clean the kitchen so I can do so. I need that catharsis of creating baked goods for people (other than me!) to eat. Dark chocolate fudge is a definite on the list. Hopefully I've got enough ingredients for a double batch.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 05:49 PM

Tried a new restaurant last night. The sad part is, it is less than ten minutes from my house and yet in seven years we hadn't been. And it was good.

We had this gift certificate from last Christmas, that was going to expire in a couple of months. We were originally saving it to go out on a date, but all the places we wanted to go to eat on dates weren't on the list for the gift certificate. Then Thursday or so I was driving home and drove by Moscatiellos and remembered that their name was on the list, and they were supposed to be a family restaurant. So we changed plans and took the family out.

We had a really good time. They are definitely family oriented. They brought out pizza dough for the kids to play with, and had crayons. The waiter was attentive (and was tipped well accordingly!). He made sure we really *liked* the food, not just giving lip service to the service part of the deal. And the food was good. I wouldn't say it was the most amazing Italian food I've had in the area, but it was excellent. And for the four of us, the total bill, tip included, was only around $70, which is a good night out, considering we all had dessert and Kevin had wine. The only prices that weren't great were the kids' meals, which were a little more expensive than usual. But we did have leftovers as well, so there is still more food to be eaten!

Overall, a good time, and I'm glad we went. And we'll likely go again.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 12:45 PM
September 13, 2003

Okay, queried microSHOCKS and sent the editor my new address so that I won't have to worry about losing track of his response. I hope. I'm just getting so nervous that my usual address is getting so bloody much spam these days that I'll lose real mail in the shuffle if it doesn't fit one of my filters. So I created a new address just for submitting electronically to magazines and anthologies (and maybe someday for writing conversations in general) so that I can filter it and not lose it.

Keep your fingers crossed that the news back from the query is good. *tightly crossed fingers*

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:17 PM
The new LJ is setup

And is linked in on the sidebar under the Corridor stuff. We'll see how long I survive keeping up two locations or whether it is more just a place for some comments and conversation.

Right now... writing and gaming...

Posted by Deb Atwood at 09:59 PM
Shoe Shopping?

So we went shoe shopping. Currently, I own a pair of black pumps, a pair of high heeled black boots, and that's about it on shoes in good shape. All the rest of my shoes are in pretty rough shape. I *need* shoes for work.

So we go. And we promise Dani that she can try on shoes too. Last night I found some absolutely GREAT boots at the mall, but they were $70 for the knee high boots (I've never before found high heeled black knee high boots that fit me and OMG I so want them) and $80 for the just above the ankle ones. Today we hit the places with the cheap shoes, and I had no luck. None whatsoever.

On the other hand, my daughter, who needs more shoes like, well... she doesn't need more shoes. *laughs* Still, she found a pair of knee high brown boots in patches of different colors of faux leather for $20 and they were just so cute and adorable (and there she was, running through the store in high heels... she is so my kid) that we had to buy them for her. They match her really cute fall dresses wonderfully.

So we go shoe shopping. And the one person who desperately needs shoes didn't get any. *groans* *sighs*

Posted by Deb Atwood at 08:51 PM
Kevin's New Toy

Kevin got his new phone/PDA. And it's REALLY cool. He got the Express Network on it (I will eventually drop go.web on my BlackBerry since he's got that and when we're together, I can use his phone for internet access). So we've got all our email accounts set up there, and it works really well. Browsing, Eudora... I need to get the little foldable keyboard for it eventually. It is SO neat. We kept stealing it from each other. And it's a Palm too, so it can run all the standard Palm type apps.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 08:41 PM
More on LJ...

Been thinking. And thinking and thinking. And well, it's the backburner of my brain, and I'm really doing other things, but I've got enough voices in my head that they're having little meetings and figuring things out without me.

[Gods I sound SO insane.]
[You are.]
[Gee, thanks, like I needed that confirmed.]


I think I'm going to keep my private ID on LJ private. It lets me post in a way that other people could potentially read it (which bizarrely enough is what I'm looking for... I want completely random strangers to read it, so it is... safe... so to speak). I'm also going to create a new LJ to partner with this blog.

I like the Friends view on the LJ system. It is just SO easy to keep up with things that way, and I'm ALWAYS behind on reading people's blogs. Although the logical part of my brain says that that must be the point behind using XML to syndicate a site so I could include it on my own like my own sort of Friends page. Hmph. Maybe I should figure that out eventually. Along with fixing the trackback bug that was pointed out...

[Your spreadsheet finally loaded over the bloody slow line to FAC.]
[Thanks. Better go take care of that. Back in a while.]

Stupid VPN connection is so slow that it keeps hanging on me and I keep having to take breaks from work (I know, poor me).

So, I was thinking. If I do things right, I can probably include either LJ in MT or vice versa. Or both. So that I could at least get people from point A to B easily enough.

Which means?

I'll be starting an LJ for Tryslora later today. So I can be one of the normal "me" type people. Then I have to go find everyone to add to my Friends page.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 02:44 PM

Okay, so I've got homework. I'm sitting here with two computers running side by side, and my timesheet staring me in the face, and I've gotta go get my keys so I can jack into FAC's network.

This weekend, before I can go to work on Monday, I have to...

  • identify all applications which will need to run parallel during the three day overlap of our two back office systems at the end of October

  • identify a small handful of apps to use for user acceptance after the next mock (which is rapidly approaching)

  • go through all of the new stored procedures and identify where to use entry date and where to use trade full date for each piece of trade information

  • do the same bloody thing in the trades information program since it doesn't use stored procs

  • create a template of the mail database i created for the admins so that they can transfer historical mail into a new archiving software suite

Somehow I think that should all keep me busy. Off to go get those keys. Figure I'll try to knock off the quickest ones first!

Posted by Deb Atwood at 02:06 PM

So I've been thinking... as I'm interacting over at lintra's LJ, I'm being Merrideath. I've got two LJs, neither of which updates often. One's the private one... for ranting and raving and babbling about private things I'm not supposed to talk about in a place where I can get it off my chest. So that means it isn't one of my usual peoples in my head -- no trys, no D.. Then there's Merri's place, which is for DJ's game. But I'm starting to feel like if I want to be a community type person either I close down those posts I don't want to have public on my private ID and open that up (even though she doesn't look as much like me) or else I need a me ID.

It's all just thinking so far. Like I have time to keep up another blogging place. *smiles* There's a reason I shut down my food blog and my gaming blog and started doing it all in one place!

I guess I know my limits. I'm just not very good at staying within them.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 09:27 AM
Dresden Files, Take Two

Whoops! Saw from Jenn's comment that the blogging software (MT) stripped out the email address from the post because it was enclosed in "<" marks. So I've changed the delimeters and reposted it. The @ has been changed so that the spidery things don't pick it up and send it spam.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 12:37 AM
September 12, 2003
still waiting on microShocks

Still waiting to hear from the Microshocks anthology. I've been seeing posts of both acceptances and rejections... since I've received neither (I think, unless it got deleted out of my email by accident) I'm hoping that's a good sign. Either way, keeping my fingers crossed and trying to decide if I should query the editor to check in. I hate sounding over-eager or worse yet, being a nuisance. But I'm also starting to get nervous that I deleted the notification by accident somehow in the depths of the SPAM I get every day. *groans*

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:27 PM
weird night, weird mood

I'm not quite bouncing off the walls like last night. More... tired, contemplative, and all kinds of things running through my head.

There's the pain. The fibro's gotten bad today, and my left shoulder is really bad. It doesn't make me real interested in typing, walking, or well, doing much of anything except hoping it stops HURTING. Driving me nuts.

There's the tired. But it's Friday and we kept the kids up late, so I can hope to maybe get to sleep in a little tomorrow.

We went out phone shopping. Kevin made the decision to buy his new phone/Palm (both his old ones are pretty much broken). But we couldn't get it because the Verizon store was out of the phone he wanted. The one on Central Ave is holding one for us to pick up tomorrow, after we go to the Computer Show and pick up an operating system (yes, I really truly have no Win2k install disks) for the computer I have to build for Dani since hers bit the big one while we were on vacation.

Between computer building, Albacon meetings, brunch with friends, and shopping... I have to work this weekend. I have a ton of code to read and things that are due at 8:30am Monday morning. I'd rather get them done before 3am that same morning. *smile*

Then there's the gaming. The problem with having a really good time in a PBEM in an amazing tense scene is that well... sometimes it takes time to get the posts out. Leaving me with Dara bouncing up and down in my head totally impatient to see what happens next (even though there's a good chance it ain't going to be easy on her!). Makes thinking interesting.

Shared brains are not easy on the head. The voices get loud sometimes, and I'm not entirely sure what to do to quiet them down. I've been playing on lintra's LJ where she's got some threads going on. But that's not really helping Dara tone it down, either. *chuckles*

And of course, the logical part of my brain says WRITE tonight. Get it OUT. Do SOMETHING. Yet I just can't seem to settle down enough to do so. Not conducive to being that sort of organizedly creative, I suppose.

Just rambling on and on and on...

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:10 PM
mind wandering

I know, my mind is just way too little to be let out on it's own. But it is insisting. I have time to code, and I forgot what coding is like.

It's like... I get so very focused on what I am doing that at the same time, I get completely unfocused and my brain starts obsessing on other topics. Like Dara's parentage. Or the fact that Damara might well get some if she's not interrupted... Or starting to wander into writing topics, like more Dreamwalker.

This is not to say that I have a moment's time available for any of these things just now! *laughs* Although I can't wait to get Merlin's response to Dara's story. Gods that was hard to write. But it also had that sort of cathartic feel to it as Dara got it off her chest... I mean, that was a long time for her to be unable to say a damned thing to the son she's never gotten to talk to.

Yeah, Dara's turning out to be just perfect for me to play. Managed to get herself just going all in the wrong directions, tried to correct, threw a snit fit and got herself turned around again and got in trouble for it... and now she's doing her best to get back to where she wants to be. She's not young, but she's discovering things for the first time because she's never had that luxury before. It's going to be a blast.

So my brain's distracted. Gaming and coding go together inexorably somehow in my head. It should make for an interesting weekend, since I've gotta spend the weekend reading code!

Posted by Deb Atwood at 02:13 PM
September 11, 2003
WOOHOO!! Dresden Files!

Okay, I'm just about bouncing off the walls from this one.

First, if you haven't read Jim Butcher's Dresden Files, go read. I just finished book 5 and it was fantastic. Thanks way much to Josh & Jenn for turning me onto these. They are quick reads, fun (Harry Dresden has a great sense of humor), and just all over wonderful. Yes, I'm being effusive. But they really are that sort of series.

But what am I bouncing about? Other than a desperate desire for the next book (the ending to this one left us with this HOOK that makes me so want the next one!)? Well... read on for a post (copied with permission) from Jim Butcher to his fan lists.


Hey guys!

Let's cut straight to the chase: the Dresden Files are on the home stretch in Hollywood.

In two weeks, Morgan Gendel, together with Nick Cage's production company, Saturn Films, will be meeting with some heavyweight network types about the Dresden Files. Morgan is aiming at an hour-long weekly series, and if the suits like the idea and think it could be a winner, they'll buy it, and it will be the real deal.

It's more than I ever dreamed or really hoped might happen to my career, or to the stories I wrote.

But let's give credit where credit is due: you guys, the fans, are the ones who really made the Dresden Files fly. I know that there are more than a few people out there who have proselytized the books with fanatic intensity, rearranged bookstores, casually loaned copies out to hook a new reader, or otherwise gone out of their way to spread good words about my work. I do not doubt that there are some people out there who have spent more time selling other people on my work than I have writing it. Thank you.

Others have come to the books more recently, through the dulcet readings of the good Mister Marsters, and James' fans are more than simply welcome. They've been an enormous boost in terms of sales and a worried young writer's morale. So also to the more recent Marsters fans who have helped me out, again, thank you.

That said, I need everyone's help. :)

One of the critical factors in the negotiations over the series will be the presence (or lack thereof) of a grassroots fanbase for the series. IE, the suits want to know that SOMEONE is going to want to watch this show. So I got together with Morgan, and here's the deal. He's setting up an email address for the sole purpose of receiving mail from fans in support of the books as a series.

Let me say that in a slightly different way: FANS are going to have some say over whether or not this show is going to go into production, as WELL as over who might be approached to be cast in the series.

How many SciFi fan groups have rallied together in an effort to save their favorite cancelled show? It worked once, with original Star Trek. Other efforts were made with equal intensity but lacked success, and the corpses of shows like B5: Crusade, Farscape, Beauty and the Beast, Jules Verne, and many, MANY others now lay in the Hallowed Halls of Syndication or are lost in the Catacombs of Obscurity.

But I don't think ANY of them had a fan base helping them get STARTED.

This is pretty much a historical first, guys. For people who have longed to have a voice of any kind in the future of SF television, here is a place to begin. If you want to see the Dresden Files launched as a television series, you need to send email to the address below and SAY SO. If you want a particular actor playing a particular role (*kaffkaff*MarstersasDresden*kaffkaff*), you also need to send email to the below address and SAY SO.

A strong fan presence behind the Dresden Files is going to make a huge difference when everyone bellies up to the negotiating table. I mean come on, how many producers could show film execs a few thousand fan emails for a show that hasn't even been CREATED yet. :) What's more, if that same fan presence has a strong desire to see a particular actor playing the part, it is going to send a big old message to the producers, who will treat that desire seriously.

At the end of this email, I'm including a template email that you can use to send to the fan-support mailbox for the Dresden Files going to TV. Feel free to write your own should you wish, but I want to provide the template so that all you will need to do is cut and paste the template below, filling in your own answers.

I cannot stress enough how perfectly serious I am about this. If Dresden is to hit the screen, I will need as much support (and as many emails) as we can possibly get. So don't feel you have to be a member of a fan club or mailing list to send in your opinion. You don't. Your opinion counts just as much as everyone else's, and I urge everyone who loves SF&F television to lend their voice to Dresden's cause, and to asks other fans of the genre to do the same. :)

This is beyond exciting, and of course I will keep the list posted as I get new information. Email template follows.




To: "Dresden Files E-mail" {dresdenfiles (at) linkline (dot) com}
Subject: Dresden Files Television Series

Dear Morgan,

I am in favor of the production of the Dresden Files to television and/or movies!

On a scale of one to ten, I would watch the series with the following frequency. _______ ("1--Eh, whenever" to "10--Each and every week, possibly in costume.")

Given a choice of actors to play the part of Harry Dresden, I think that ________________________________ would be an excellent choice.


(Your name here)


Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:13 PM
Brain in a spin

I can tell I've stopped sleeping again.

It's not just that I'm exhausted, yet unable to sleep. No real desire to sleep -- I'm way too antsy.

But my brain's in a spin.

It's hopping from topic to topic. Makes me feel desperate to do something, but unable to latch onto a topic long enough to be productive. I feel like I should be writing, like my neurons are firing so fast and furious that I should be able to produce amazing wordcount.

But no way. My fingers stumble across the keyboard. I can't get the moths that are my thoughts to form coherent patterns.

I want to game... but there aren't player moves to answer. (Except for Jordan's OMG WOW reaction to Ybara but that's temporarily put him sub-verbal so I'd better wait until he finds language again before I type that response). There are GM-moves to answer for RoP (Aren't there always?) but I'm doing the same thing as when I'm writing and my fingers hover over the keyboard, type a letter, erase it, and suddenly I'm over on the blog babbling instead.

Looked at Merri's livejournal. Realized that me and DJ are the only ones who can see most of it. If there's anyone out there that isn't in UTG that wants to see the game sorts of posts, drop me a line and I'll add you to a group and let you see them.

Ok, I've gotta go channel this energy somehow and find something to bloody well write.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 09:23 PM
All the Marks of Humanity

Hm... things pop into my mind at the strangest moments.

Dara was the first of her line to bear all the marks of humanity. Given that her grandmother (or mother, depending on what theory you subscribe to) was the child of Benedict and Lintra, that starts the line at half Chaosian and half Amberite. In order to filter out the Chaosian blood and bring forth a shapeshifter capable of bearing a human form as a natural form, that implies not introducing more Chaosian blood to the mix. Given that it was a breeding project, I wouldn't expect them to dilute the power of her blood with shadow genes. Which makes one wonder... who the hell was Dara's father?

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:57 AM
September 10, 2003
Writing and Gaming

A good game is like a page-turner of a novel. You wait anxiously for the next session, the next email, the next thing to happen. You get wrapped up in the characters. And they surprise you. It is rewarding and frustrating all at the same time.

Yeah, got some good ones going at the moment. *grins*

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:10 PM
Head Spinning

Wow. I have offiically eaten way too much sugar and chocolate this afternoon. Started with this wonderful lunch (Fetuccine Danielle down at Lombardos when I went out to lunch with Lloyd and Johnny) and then ate the fudge Meri brought in. My head is spinning! Damn! I'm sitting here, trying to concentrate on work and wondering if this is a good buzz or if it starting to edge into a bad buzz. Like, I can't type quite right -- my typo quotient is pretty damned high.

Gotta get through gymnastics tonight. No work tonight -- not when I don't get home until 8pm as it is. Although I may work *at* gymnastics since it is a time that Audrey and I get to talk. Gotta maximize time availability!

Okay, so I'm brain-fried. Time to go see if the query has finished running and go write another stored procedure against a table I don't have data for yet. *giggles* It's like existentialist coding.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 03:32 PM
September 08, 2003
Digging in the Vault

I went digging into the vault buried on my computer and found an ancient copy of "Barefoot in the Kitchen". Not sure if it is the most recent revision, but some of the holes in it are patched.

It is always fascinating to read an old piece of writing. Seeing all the problems. Seeing all the huge holes in the plot (like why the hell *didn't* she hit him with the pot or throw the oil at him? why the bloody hell is she so docile? this all needs more explanation...). But yeah, I still like it. A part of me wonders if the plot is overdone... trite maybe. Hopefully not.

Going to see if I can get this into shape. Got a lot of writing to do. I'm refusing to post anything to the workshop just now, until I get a lot of things out of my system and onto paper (or rather, computer screen). Then I focus on reviewing (after I pull my current subs down). A LOT of catch up, and some paying forward. Then I'll post. I need to get ahead in the reviewing. Work has made me fall too far behind, and I'm feeling horribly guilty about it all.

And the next month isn't likely to be good for me. Since Ethan left, I'm programming. Yes, programming. We're out of Notes programmers, so Wendy and I have split the IR conversion so we can get it done in time. It's a lot of work, but in a strange way I'm looking forward to it. After all, I still love coding. *happy little grins* I spent part of today digging into it, fixing a few forms to add some new, necessary fields. Tomorrow, sometime between the meetings & dr appt, I start the agents. Whee.

But it means my time is less than ever. Unless I work doubletime in the office, or tripletime... eeking out more from every minute than it's sixty second's worth. Because I've got things to do at home too. I've got a family. And responsibilities.

It'll be interesting. Totally in the Chinese proverb way. *sighs*

Posted by Deb Atwood at 11:04 PM
Giggling Uncontrollably

Many thanks to Mark, who posted this link to the OWW list:

Lost in Translation

Must stop trying to put in phrases to see how they come out. Must stop giggling.

For example...

Damara would rather speak with a blade than fence with words.

Babelized Text (incl. Chinese/Japanese/Korean)
Damara speech in the small amount in the word, of which it extends in this external hand? Banana De Mul.

And I have no bloody clue where the bananas came into the whole process! The banana plant appeared after the Chinese translation and became Banana Mul right after that. Weird!!!

But oh so giggly!

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:27 PM

I'm coding! I'm coding! *bounce*

There should be something truly disturbing about the fact that my reaction to getting a HUGE project I don't have time for dumped into my lap is "YAY!"

Posted by Deb Atwood at 09:49 AM
September 07, 2003
nerves, nerves

Just read on the Rumor Mill that people have started hearing from the microShocks anthology. Nothing yet... At this point, all I can do is cross my fingers.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:41 PM
Food fights

Food is a constant battle in our household. We put a small amount of food on Danielle's plate. She takes a half an hour and doesn't eat it. And then she moans that she's hungry. Right now she's sitting in the bathtub having hysterics, all because she didn't eat five bites of meat.

It's a silly battle. But I refuse to let her have dessert when she hasn't made the attempt to eat. She thinks that if she can outwait me, and outcry me, she'll get what she wants. And it doesn't work that way.

And so we battle. Constantly. And tonight, while she's exhausted because she didn't sleep well last night and refused to nap today, she's battling harder than ever. Soon I'll have to go wash her (because she's dumping water out of the tub as a part of the tantrum) and just put her into bed and listen to her scream for a while. It's not going to be a good night.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 06:38 PM
We bid the Labyrinth welcome...

The Labyrinth Blog has found a small place within the Hall of Mirrors.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 01:12 PM
September 06, 2003

Okay, I should be finishing up sending out game moves, but I am going to give up and live with the guilt. I am in just too much back pain tonight to manage to sit at the computer... hormones suck.

Posted by Deb Atwood at 11:04 PM
Gaming by LiveJournal?

Okay, it's not a new game, but it's a new way of gaming. Unto the Third Generation is run by DJ Quinn and I started playing in it at ACUS last year. Played two sessions so far, and I'm hooked on Meredith (my character). And DJ just started running it via LiveJournal, so now Merri has her own LJ. Should be interesting...

Posted by Deb Atwood at 10:02 PM