I had dozed off as we traveled through the cave, the strange illumination sending me into an almost trance. But the bright sunlight as we exited the dark cave snapped me out of it, and I felt waves of heat washing over me. We were standing at the top of a rocky crag, staring out over a vast desert.

Kiwarr stopped her horse and pointed at a speck I could barely see in the distance. "There is my resort. It's not much, but…"

"It'll do, I'm sure," Saivu interrupted her. I had the feeling, from the way they both acted, that he outranked her in some way here. I didn't understand it, but his attitude was definitely expecting some sort of subservience from her. And she gave it. "In the meantime," he continued, "we can rest in the shade of the cave mouth. I want to check on those wounds of yours, Damara, and make sure there's no poison at work."

I was far too achy, not to mention exhausted, to argue, and besides, I figured it might be in my best interests. I wasn't at my peak performance -- the way I had phased out during the ride had proved that to me. What I really wanted to do was crawl into a corner, but there wasn't time for that yet. And Saivu… his head wound was gone altogether, and he moved as if the wound in his side gave him no trouble either. And Kiwarr's toes were still gone, but the wounds were sealed, the blood gone except where traces of it lingered.

They were healed, and I still wanted to rest. I hoped that was where we were heading… with these strangers for my companions, whoever they were. Questions spun around in my head as Saivu examined me, but I couldn't find the words to put them to coherent speech. I resolved to ask them later, when we were done with horses and were on more stable… and more comfortable… ground.

"I don't think you've been poisoned. Good." The Count completed his examination and sat back, removing his finely tailored blue coat and tossing it to Kiwarr. "Cut this into bandages, if you please. I'm concerned about sand getting into the wound." She made short work of the garment with her claws, and once I was bandaged I climbed back up onto my horse and we traveled on.

It took about four hours of uncomfortable hard travel across the desert and then we were there. Seemed like her description was dead on -- the resort looked like nothing special. And I had thought she was just being modest. But it was only a round one story building, with a cylindrical tower next to it rising about five stories high.

Then we went in, and it seemed like there was more. The building was a stable for all manner of riding beasts, including some I'd never seen before. There was a hole in the floor in the center of the building, where a spiral staircase led down.

Lady Kiwarr took us down to huge chambers below, cool, with fresh air. Small reptilian servants appeared, offering all manner of food and drink as we collapsed against huge silken pillows. I felt comfortable, finally, sinking into the softness, enjoying the sensation of sitting still in such luxury.

Kiwarr started to speak, but Saivu cut her off. "Would you mind excusing us for a minute?"

She looked a bit put out, but she had a natural graciousness which snapped back into place as she replied, "Of course not, my Lore. Excuse me. I'll arrange for sleeping quarters in case either of you wishes to stay for a while after our ordeal."

"Thanks," he told her, still perfectly casual. He accepted her subservience as if it were his due. I didn't feel like giving him the same… he wasn't my lord, nor was a part of this hierarchy, whatever it was.

He turned to me, sounding for the first time a bit uncertain. "I have something that I want to ask you, and I hope you won't be offended at the impertinence of the question." He paused, brushing back his black hair from his eyes to reveal the handsome face hidden by those locks. "I know this could be construed as an indecent proposal, but when it comes to manners I'm afraid… Damn it, I'm just going to come out and say it…"

I sat up, stiffening and wary at his words. He didn't seem dangerous, but with what he had said I couldn't be sure. I'd always guarded myself carefully… everything on my own terms.

"Will you be my bodyguard?"

I relaxed suddenly, in some surprise, slumping back against the pillows. I dragged my hand through my hair, letting out the breath I didn't even realize I was holding.

"I've only seen a handful of people fight like you in my entire life. Now, if you already have some kind of contract with Kiwarr, I'm sure I can get you out of it, so don't worry about that. Just tell me what you want and I'm sure we can work something out.

"What do you say?"

I laughed a little, more at myself than anything else. "That wasn't what I thought you were going to say," I admitted, shaking my head. "Why would you think twice about asking me that? My sword is for hire, and I don't have any contract with Lady Kiwarr… in fact, I had just arrived at the casino when I bumped into her." I had a sudden flash of memory then, of the creature I had followed, and of seeing Saivu do just the same thing later.

He beamed happily. "Wonderful."

I sat up again, leaning forward, drawing my feet up until my elbows were propped on my knees. "Mind if I ask you a few questions first?" I had to know what the hell was going on. "Where the bloody hell am I?"

"You are in the Black Zone. On the edges of the Courts of Chaos. Where are you from, anyway? It can't be from around here. How did you get here?"

"Nowhere around here," I agreed readily. This was certainly stranger than anything I'd seen in my travels. "I'm from…" I waved my hand, not even sure which direction home was. "Somewhere else. Nowhere really, anymore. I wander a lot."

"Well, that certainly narrows it down," Saivu said dryly. "I know a lot of people from there."

I flashed a grin at him, acknowledging the joke. At least, I thought it was. I wasn't entirely certain. And it gave me a minute to stop and think about how I got there at all. I wasn't sure how to put it into words. "I can't really explain it any better than that. Because I don't understand it myself. I just… go."

"That's fine," he reassured me. "If you don't want to tell me where you're from, that's your business. I want to hire your sword, and I don't particularly care where it's been."

My eyes snapped to his in surprise. "I'm not trying to avoid the question," I told him quickly. "You don't seem surprised by the idea of someone coming from somewhere else entirely… not surprising, given what that casino was like. I just don't bother to find out the name of the places I've been… and I honestly don't know how I get there exactly. I just *do*."

I continued on, getting to the explanation of what had happened most recently. "I was following something… well, looking for it really. And suddenly I was at the casino. Which is like nothing I've ever seen before. And then you… you did something, to get to the sphere. What was that?" I was curious, avidly curious about the answer to that question.

"I invoked the power of the Logrus. The power of true Chaos. The tendrils can take me to or bring to me just about anything I desire," he explained. "It has other uses as well, and there are quite a few things that I could learn to do with it if I were just a halfway decent student, which I most certainly am not." He reached over to the table and poured more wine for both of us. He seemed content to keep talking and drinking, so I figured it'd help me out… maybe I could learn a few things.

I took the wine and sipped at it slowly. I didn't want to dull my wits in this strange place. "The Logrus," I echoed. "And Chaos." I shook my head, smiling ruefully. "I'm definitely far from home here. I've never heard of the Logrus, nor Chaos as a place. Does it work to go to places… between realities?"

"Yes it does, if by realities you mean Shadows. That's one of its greatest uses. To be honest, though, I'm not sure if I can take someone with me who can't change form. I've never had to try it before. Since you aren't from here, I should ask, can you shift your form? Like so?"

My eyes widened as his skin grew scaly and green, his eyes shifting to yellow and slitted. Then the scales slipped away and he became himself again. "I didn't want to change all the way, but you get the idea."

I shook my head. "No, no… I can't say I can do that. I've never seen anything like it. And I certainly can't do it myself." I took a deep breath, trying to gather my thoughts together again. The shifting of his shape had caught me off-guard, and I stared at him for a long moment. "I've never heard the term Shadows. I mean *realities*. Worlds that differ in sky, peoples. Language sometimes. Walking around the corner to discover that two moons hang in the sky instead of only one, and the sky's a gentle shade of purple. Things like that."

I remembered the creature then… the one that had interrupted me, and realized what Saivu had said. If I couldn't follow him if I couldn't shift my shape, and the creature had used Logrus… "That would explain why I couldn't find that creature."

"Creature?" he asked, more out of courtesy than curiosity.

"Something that disturbed me. Never seen anything like it before." I shook my head, remembering it. "But it moved like you did."

"Logrus initiation is not a too uncommon procedure among the upper nobility at the Courts," he sipped at his wine as he explained. "But your moving through Shadows just from walking around? That's strange. I… wait. Wait just a minute." He stopped, staring straight ahead of himself, seeming to concentrate. "Damn, I did this once in class for the exam, but…" His voice trailed off, and after a few moments a writhing twisting shifting mass about a food wide appeared in front of his face. It didn't seem to bother him, so I didn't let it bother me as he turned to look at me, sort of through it.

And just a moment later his jaw dropped open, his mouth forming a perfect "O". He scrambled to his feet, backing up, the strange apparition in front of his face disappearing. "Holy shit! You're an Amberite!" He was looking around, panicked, seeming caught between bowing and drawing his sword.

Everything was strained suddenly. I was on my feet, my hand on the hilt of my sword, staring at both Saivu and the lizard servants who had gathered to watch us. They were watching us carefully, as wary as I was. And in the distance I could hear the echos of Kiwarr's four legs clicking against the tiles, coming closer. We had to settle this, and I wasn't even entirely certain what was happening. I couldn't see Saivu as a threat, but his body language was confused. And I didn't even understand why.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I snapped, uncertainty annoying me. "I have no idea what you're talking about. Explain." I glanced at the door, but I kept most of my attention on Saivu. "Now. Kiwarr's on her way."

He snapped to attention, almost like one of my men. He took a few deep breaths to steady himself, still staring at me. Then he addressed the lizard servants. "It's quite all right. Just an innocent misunderstanding. Assure Lady Kiwarr that we're fine here and that her wine is excellent."

It was what the lizards were waiting for, and they scuttled away, leaving us alone again in the room. The clicking of footsteps stopped, and for the moment at least, we were to be left alone.

Saivu began talking again, but it seemed like he wasn't really talking to me. "Well, if it's a ruse, then it's a good one. You already had me unaware, so I doubt you'll just kill me now."

I tried to keep the smile from my face, but I'm sure some of it slipped out. I was still wary, but hearing him talk that way, about me, about something I knew nothing about, amused me.

He turned his full attention on me, "Please let's sit back down, and if you don't already know them then I'll explain some things. Get comfortable, this'll take a while."

I took a seat, leaning forward to listen as he began to talk. And talk he did. Kiwarr's footsteps faded away as we settled in for the conversation. Hours passed as he talked, telling me about the Abyss, Chaos, and the creation of a place called Amber. He couldn't tell me much about it, but he did tell me that it was created by someone from Chaos. And Amber… that was the place he told me I was from.

He talked about a war between Amber and Chaos, where one of Amber's royal family -- Brand -- allied himself with the Courts of Chaos and helped them wage war against his home. Saivu never fought in the war, so he didn't know much more than that. He could tell me a few names of those of Amber -- Benedict, the dead King Oberon, and the new King Random. Amber did not demand reparations after the war, and those of Chaos appreciated that stance. "But still, we are told to be wary," Saivu added, "since essentially Amber is our polar opposite, and it's probably only a matter of time before we're at war again."

Then he smiled. "Still want to be my bodyguard?"

I couldn't see what difference it would make to me. I shrugged. "No matter whether that thing I walked was the Pattern or not, I have no ties to those people. I grew up on my own, and the only contact I've ever had with anyone was when I walked that." A flash behind my eyes reminded me abruptly of the man I saw then, who told me to walk that bright line. I dragged myself back to the conversation. "I can't see any conflict with being your bodyguard. However, will those around you take offense at my presence?" I smiled tightly. "If I'm going to be fighting, I'd rather be doing it for a better reason than someone decides they don't like my blood."

He had to think it over. "I don't see someone attacking you just because you're an Amberite. It could start a war or something."

I had to find that amusing… the idea of starting a war over my blood. Or perhaps odd was a better word. I just couldn't conceive of my being that important… important enough to start a war over.

"Still," he continued, "there could be some nut out there who might try something. Maybe we would be best served just taking a little vacation into Shadow for a while, just in case."

Exploring rarely sounded like a bad idea to me. I'd always enjoyed traveling, so I simply shrugged without committing myself yet, since Saivu was already continuing.

"You know, I just had a thought. Prince Merlin is half Amberite and half Chaosian." Saivu turned to look at me. "If anyone would know more about the things you want to know, it would be him. I'm not exactly friends with him, but it might be an option."

I had to admit to a niggling sense of curiosity. I'd never really thought about it -- the Pattern -- since it happened, but now, knowing that it really did mean something more, it seemed important for me to understand it all. "It might help, if it could be arranged," I agreed. "I'd appreciate it."

"Sure." He grinned. "I've never been one to make appointments, though. If you want to see him then I think we should just go to him."

Go to him. There was a certain appeal there. Just go and find out the answer. It was just like my own methods. Direct.

Saivu leaned a little closer to me, whispering, "Either way, how about we sneak out of here? I know that Pattern users can take people with them through Shadow, and I'm not sure what the Logrus would do to you if I used it to move us. Knowing Lady Kiwarr, we'll probably be bowing, curtseying, and bidding farewell for hours if we let her know we're going." He smiled at me, that boyish smile. "What do you say?"

I found myself reacting to him, laughing a little, quietly. "I've never been one to stand on ceremony." I couldn't really see any reason to stand here, caught in a matter of society. There were other considerations though, things I guessed might be possible, but I hadn't tried them before.

"I've never started somewhere inside," I admitted, "I've usually just started on down the road and then I'm somewhere else. Never taken anyone with me, either. I suppose it could be possible." I shrugged, thoughtful. "Willing to give it a whirl, anyway."

"Good." He smiled. "I don't know how you do it, but let's try. Prince Merlin, out into shadow on vacation, or wherever. I want to see how it works." There was a light of interest in his eyes.

"Any reason we'll need Kiwarr's favor later on?" I had to ask. I may not be a diplomat, but I've dealt with enough of them to get some of the niceties through my head.

He shrugged. "I just met the woman today. She certainly doesn't seem to be afraid to fight, but she seems to know her place. I don't think there is much to concern ourselves with there. Still, I'll write her a quick note of apology and leave it here, just in case." He called for parchment and a quill from one of the little lizard people, and quickly jotted a few words onto the paper. He set it aside on one of the tables and promptly seemed to forget it.

Watching him, I had one more question on my mind before we left. "What should I call you? Count? Saivu? Or something else?"

It sounded like something he had recited often before, almost as if he had memorized the words and repeated them by rote to me. "When we're alone, you may address me simply as Saivu. When we are in the company of others you should call me 'Count', 'Count Saivu' or 'My Lord'. This should be…" His voice trailed off and he looked over at me, a bit of rememberance seeming to dawn in his eyes. "Oh. You're an Amberite. I think that might make you a Princess or a Duchess or something…" His voice trailed off, sounding confused and embarassed. "I'm not really sure. Why don't we just call each other by our names and be done with it, hmm?"

A princess? I had to stifle a laugh at the idea of myself as a princess, with all the pomp and finery that goes with the station. Not to mention Saivu's reaction to the idea that his bodyguard might outrank him in polite society. I wouldn't have minded addressing him by title -- I've dealt with that before. But there was something amusing about his fascination with that Amberite heritage I'd barely just discovered. Something that bore looking into, if I could only figure out how.

He stood quickly, discarding that matter as well. "Shall we go?"

"Sure, let's get out of here." I stood as well, then realized, I wasn't sure where I was going. "Can you give me an idea how I might find this Merlin? Or where? Usually I just walk until I find another place with work… I've only gone looking for something specific once, and that was when I found the casino. And then, at least, I'd seen what I was looking for once before."

"Hmm." Saivu was thoughtful. "I'm sure there is a portrait of him somewhere. Hold on." He stared past me, off into space for a moment, and the strange twisting, shifting thing he had named the Logrus appeared in front of him. A shimmering, mostly transparent tendril shot out of the room, curving down the hallway towards the stairs.

I glanced around the room, seeking the best way out, and almost seeking some hint which way I should begin. There were no windows at all, the place fully underground. All the doorways were tall marble archways, and there was a vast sound to the place, and I realized I could travel in just about any direction with plenty of time for the world to shift and change around us as we walked. Shadow-walked. That was the term, I believed. And I supposed, now that I knew it, that I should begin to use the correct words.

A full sized oil painting, framed in gold, flew into the room, carried by the tendril to Saivu's hands. The man in the painting was slim and dark-haired, dressed in violet colored finery and with a gold-hilted sword at his side. "That's him. Is this good enough?" Saivu displayed the picture to m.

I nodded. "We can talk more while we walk, too," I said hopefully. There was still a lot I needed to know, and perhaps Saivu knew more than he thought he did. "How old are you?" I was curious. I felt somehow that I was older than he was, and was curious if that was true.

We were walking already, passing through the cavernous stone halls as things shifted around us. I sought Merlin, but had to change shadow here to make that happen. Stone turned from peach to maroon and the lizards became orange weasels, and soon we were outside again. I softened the merciless desert heat to a high plains. And when Count Saivu complained of his aching feet, two horses awaited us around the next butte.

"Thank you," he said, "Assuming that that was you who got the horses. To answer your question, I'm twenty-five years old. And you?"

I answered honestly. "Can't be sure exactly, and things get even hazier once I started wandering. I'm guessing around um…" I did a quick mental recap of the past few years, "around twenty-three or so." I was seated on the horse and my hands drifted to touch the bracers reflexively, crossing my arms as I thought back to the day. It was an instinctive reaction when I remembered my 18th birthday and Agrivar's death. For a moment sorrow drifted over me, and I switched topics before I let it mire me in depression. "So, why do you need a bodyguard?"

"Oh, no reason in particular," he said quickly. "Just… people at the Courts tend to take things the wrong way. Just little things, like ditching out without saying goodbye, ripping the portrait of a Prince down from the gallery section at the Royal Palace, or making off with someone else's date at a ball. People there are just… touchy."

I hid a smile, raising an eyebrow as I looked over at him. "I take it you've done all of these things, not just ditching at Lady Kiwarr."

We continued to talk, idly conversing around various topics as we rode, the terrain softening even further. Trees began to pop up on the horizon as darkenss fell. Saivu was yawning more than talking soon after that, and we stopped for him to rest. We spent two more days of travel, and two more nights of rest. Over breakfast the next morning, in a diner floating two feet off the ground, Saivu asked wearily, "We're definitely going places, but are you sure we're going to the *right* places? I wouldn't mind taking a little break at a spa somewhere. It's been a while since I've done this much traveling on horseback." He shifted uncomfortably in his seat as he spoke.

I couldn't help it, the chuckle slipped out before I could catch it. "I'm not usually looking for such a specific goal… I don't even know if I *can* find this Merlin person." I caught the next smile and hid it. "Horseback can be tough on a person. I've been doing it since I was a kid. Pretty much constantly after that, I think. Um…" I had a sudden flash of memory, changing his shape so abruptly when he had tried to explain the concept to me. "Can you… well… can you make yourself more comfortable for riding? If you can't, I could probably try to get you a more comfortable saddle. More padding. Other than that, let's at least keep trying till we need another break, and I'll try to make that break interesting."

He looked sheepish. "Whenever I try and do something tricky with my forms, it usually takes a while to get the hand of it, but I'll give it a try. I'll just practice for a minute. Excuse me."

He disappeared into the bathroom, and I had time to think over two more drinks before he returned. "Okay, I think I've got it," he told me. "Let's go."

As we began our travels again, I noticed that Saivu had, indeed, some extra padding in his seat. He smiled and winked at me, at my noticing, and I was caught off guard by his boyish charm. And then we headed out.

It was getting easier as we traveled, leading him through the realities, even if it had been strange when we first started out. I wasn't used to traveling with anyone at all, let alone across the worlds. I'd only traveled with a companion once, for a very short while, and other than that it was always with an army. So that was strange in itself. And I was itching to find Merlin, to ask my questions and assuage the curiosity that had been building since Saivu first told me what I was. Who I was.

The worlds began to change, technology sliding away and soon we were riding along a desolate, rocky coastline. Pink waves crashed loudly on the beach, and our conversation fell away with them, impossible in the noise. We traveled all through that day, and the two after that.

And then that night as we camped beneath a forest of crystal trees, Saivu sent a tendril out to retrieve some sort of musical instrument. It looked like a cross between a guitar with thirty strings and a bagpipe. "I can't take it any more," he griped about the travels. "Let's at least have some music."

He held the bag under his arm and extra fingers sprouted on each hand, then an extra hand grew at his elbow to cover the holes on the bagpipes flute. He played it, and sound like four people played at once came from it, surrounding us in the evening. There were a few off notes in the beginning, but after a few songs I heard nothing but pure, lovely music.

On the fifth song, as he grew more comfortable, he began to sing. He sang in harmony with himself, and I wondered if he grew a mouth someplace I couldn't see. He made beautiful music, and as I enjoyed it I understood how he could steal someone's date at a ball. I liked him, and enjoyed his company, despite the obvious differences in our personalities. He just took some getting used to.

After a while he shifted to a quieter music, strumming softly while I drifted in the haze of almost sleep. I watched the firelight reflected a thousand times against the crystal trunks of the trees, and let my mind wander until I slipped into a restful sleep.