It began with Sebastian. He informed me that my mother was hosting a ball in the Courts, and that he expected me to attend with him. As myself. As a member of his household. I fleetingly considered arguing the point, since I didn't want any misplaced rescue missions from my relatives, but I quickly changed my mind. Instead I went to change, accompanied by Samuel.

Once in the privacy of my own room, I railed against the situation. Samuel reminded me quite bluntly that I should have known this would happen. I had known that, of course, but... perhaps I am an optimist.

I felt Samuel's hands upon my shoulder, then his lips pressing soft kisses at the base of my neck. My head fell forward, enjoying the sensation, as his hands slipped my blouse from my shoulders. I turned slightly, to kiss him, then stopped in shock as Jerrym's features stared back at me.

My first reaction was to slap him, but his hand caught mine, trapping it. He turned me under him, pinning me down, but anger rode high, accompanied by a passion that I didn't want to feel. I fought back, then tried to seduce him myself. But in the end he won, and passion won.

It was confusing. Its taken so long for me to realize how I felt about Jerrym in the first place, that for Samuel to use his shape was very difficult for me to deal with. I'd had an instinctive reaction to strike back, taking Rhiannon's form, but... I knew Samuel hadn't done it to be cruel, so I held back. In the aftermath, when we talked about it, he told me he'd been testing me. I asked if I would have done better had I shifted into Rhiannon... the answer was perhaps.

He left then, leaving me to dress for the ball. I chose a dress of shimmering green, with silver chains trimming it, shaping it to my upper body before the skirt flared around my ankles. I selected my jewelry carefully, each piece doing double-duty as decoration and concealed weapon. Formal dress in the Courts is far more ostentatious than in Amber, but then, the threats are more subtle, the weapons concealed. I didn't feel like any sort of headress that would require me to keep my carriage stiff all evening, so instead I swept my hair up, piling the copper curls atop my head, and pinning them carefully into place. The visible hair pins (each sharp at the tip and deadly) had nothing to do with the actual construction. I could probably have fallen into the ocean and not a hair on my head would have dared move once I was done pinning everything into place.

The simple act of dressing should have calmed me, but it didn't. The image of Jerrym kept returning to me, vividly. It is one thing to want someone. It is something very different to have them without ever really having them. It was going to be a very hard memory to shake.

And I wasn't entirely certain I wanted to put it away in the depths of my mind, either. In some ways, it was rather satisfying, taking the edge off of a hunger I had become accustomed to. In other ways it only left me wanting, still, the real thing.

I truly have horrid taste in men.

Sebastian had managed, somehow, to devise an outfit which carefully complimented both Samuel and I, showing that he accompanied the two of us to the ball. In spite of everything that surrounded it, I was looking forward to the evening. I had been raised for formal occasions like this one, and this was to be my first in Chaos. And since my mother hosted it, I rather expected to see Benedict there, and I looked forward to that as well.

I was not prepared for who greeted us at the door.

My mother was there, dressed in Courts formal, and flanked by two familiar figures. My feet caught at the door, and I stumbled slightly, then moved forward. I could feel the heat upon my cheeks and prayed I was not blushing in full.

"Mother," I greeted her with a smile. Then I turned to one of her companions. "Brennan," I nodded, my smile still genuine. I do enjoy Brennan's company.

I could not slight her other companion, so I turned towards him, and nodded quickly, "Jerrym." I turned back away again and hoped again that the blush I felt staining my cheeks wasn't visible. I waited just long enough for Samuel and Sebastian to say their greetings as well, and then went into the main room.

It wasn't just that Jerrym was there. I had tried to think who my mother might invite, and Jerrym and Brennan were perhaps the two last I had considered. Both hated Sebastian fervently, and I hadn't thought she would risk bringing them so closely together in an enforced social situation. But she had, and I only hoped it didn't backfire. I fully expected some scene to play out before the night was over.

I was momentarily distracted by Moira's arrival. Clad in diaphanous silk and a pair of seashells, she was lovely, and immediately attracted the attention of many attendees. As I walked towards her to greet her, I sighted her companions. Benedict stepped into the hall, Ardath on his arm.

I paused again, surprised by the pairing. Ardath smiled at me, and I felt some of the stress melting away. It seemed she had forgiven me. I nodded politely and smiled, but as the music was beginning, I thought that perhaps I would elminate one of the tests of the night quickly.

I turned to Sebastian and asked politely, "Would you care to dance?"

He agreed of course, and we danced the first dance together, while I saw Ardath dancing with Benedict. When the dance was over, I excused myself politely, then went to my father figure, in order to ask him to dance. I suspect I may have made a statement with the order I chose, first Sebastian, then Benedict. My intent was something of the sort -- to show that I am currently a member of Sebastian's household, but that I still hold strong allegiance for Amber.

The dance with Benedict was pleasant, a chance for him to inquire as to my health and happiness in Sebastian's household. I saw Ardath approach Sebastian, and they spoke for a while, as Samuel watched. There was an odd expression on Samuel's face, and Benedict and I danced closer, hoping that I might overhear some of the conversation.

For the next dance, Samuel claimed me, and I had my chance to quiz him about the conversation.

"I believe she was attempting to flirt with Sebastian," he looked amused. "She is not very good at it, is she?"

"I don't think she has much experience," I murmured, hiding my smile. "But why did you keep looking at me then?" My eyes flickered towards Ardath, and I caught myself staring. She had somehow claimed a dance with Jerrym. It was such an odd thought -- the two always at each other's throats -- that my gaze followed them for a long while.

"She was concerned about your honor."

Samuel's voice drew me back to him. "My honor?" I asked curiosly.

He nodded solemnly, laughter dancing in his eyes. "She seemed concerned that Sebastian might be testing your honor."

I had to laugh then. After all the time I've spent with Samuel, and she accuses Sebastian of seducing me. Still, I had considered it once, and discarded it as yet another example of my taste in men. The laughter stopped suddenly, as I glanced back at Ardath.

The dance was ending, and she and Jerrym parted politely. My gaze followed Ardath thoughtfully as Samuel and I made our way from the dance floor.

"Would you care to dance?"

I turned at the voice and felt a heated blush stain my cheeks. Jerrym merely waited politely for my answer, while I tried to untie my tongue. "Yeah, sure," I finally whispered, unable to call polite terms to mind. I held out my hand and he walked me out to the floor.

My stomach was in my throat as the dance began. Something so normal, like dancing... a social event. Even if Jerrym did look like he would choke on his polite words. Still it was an attempt, and perhaps something I could...

"What are you doing with them?"

Jerrym's cold words snapped me out of my daydream. "What?" My eyes snapped to his. Green orbs glittered angrily down at me, and I suddenly realized he looked a lot like a cross between the pinning gaze of his father and the cold fury that Benedict can show. I swallowed hard. "Them?" I asked softly.

"Sebastian and Samuel," he said stiffly.

This wasn't how I had hoped my first social event with Jerrym would go at all. "There's nothing wrong with Samuel," I replied, my irritation level already rising. Less than a minute on the dance floor, and we were already arguing. Quietly, so no one else would overhear, but very definitely on our way to our usual levels of interaction.

"He is with Sebastian, is he not?" Jerrym replied.

I shook my head. "Samuel and his father don't exactly... get along. Samuel is only with Sebastian because I am. He's trying to protect me."

The dance stopped suddenly, and Jerrym looked down at me. The dislike his expression usually held for me turned suddenly into hate... of the sort he held for Sebastian. Then he turned and stalked off the floor, leaving me there among the other dancing couples.

I hurried after him, not caring that we were already causing the first scene of the night. I touched his arm, receiving a glare for my efforts, but managed to steer him into one of the private alcoves.

No doubt the attendees from Chaos thought we'd had a lovers' spat, and a small tryst would smooth ruffled feathers. The Amberites in attendance knew better -- it was nothing of the sort.

"You are with Sebastian willingly," Jerrym said flatly, once we were alone.

"I am trying to learn more about the situation," I explained, pacing in the confines of the alcove. I began my speech, the same one I've used for everyone else, explaining about knowing the plans before we cut off the head. But Jerrym's eyes stayed cold, and I knew I was getting nowhere.

Finally I threw up my hands in frustration, and it was my turn to stalk away. I left the alcove, knowing he had won this argument by my forfeit. I wasn't pleased with myself, but when it comes to discussions with Jerrym it is as if my intelligence fails me, and we are reduced to incoherent growls and arguments that go round in circles and never reach a conclusion.

I made my way to the buffet, where Ardath stood speaking with Brennan. "After dealing with Jerrym, I always find I need a good stiff one," she informed me with a grin, already pressing a glass into my hand.

My cheeks flamed at the innuendo, as I gripped the glass and tossed the liquor down. It burned, and I coughed from the surprise. Ardath waited patiently for me to finish gasping, then handed me another glass. "This one is mixed," she said, still smiling. "It should go down easier."

I sipped at the new glass, and finally greeted them both properly. I was silent, not wishing to intrude upon their conversation.

Ardath turned to me. "Adrienne, I must apologize for my lack of a sense of humor the other evening."

Lack of a sense of humor? I was confused momentarily, then I realized what she meant. The kiss. Ardath thought I had been trying to lighten the moment with a practical joke. I was both relieved and frustrated by the revelation. I shrugged. "No problem. Bruises heal."

"Brennan, you will do your duty and ask my daughter to dance," Cybele appeared at his shoulder, smiling at him.

"Of course," he agreed calmly.

I didn't *quite* cause a scene this time. But we had to begin the conversation a second time, as I nearly accused him of treating me the same as everyone else.

"I am sorry," I apologized contritely. "It seems as if everyone has seen the need to correct or rescue me this evening."

"Have I done so?" he asked mildly, with a hint of steel still correcting me.

I shook my head. "No. Which is why I've apologized." I summoned a bright, cheerful smile. "Perhaps, then, we should just dance."

It set a better tone for the rest of the evening. I danced with many different people, and smiled, and laughed, and flirted, and behaved as I had learned from a very young age. I was asked curious questions, and seemed to surprise the askers by responding that I was staying with Sebastian for a time. I never named my allegiance, and let it be obvious through my actions that I still held allegiance to Amber.

The night grew late, and I was far calmer than I had been upon arriving. I knew I wanted to dance at least once more with Benedict and with Sebastian, but first, I had something to take care of. I approached Jerrym cautiously, expecting to be rebuffed, as I asked softly, "Would you care to dance?"

He looked surprised, but he took my hand and led me out to the dance floor. We began in silence, two polite strangers ignoring each other even as the music swept them across the floor. Then I began to speak.

"May I ask you a question?"

He seemed surprise by my query, and nodded his assent.

"Why do you resent me so much?" I had decided blunt honesty was the best tactic. Perhaps, for once, we could go beyond the fighting and actually try to understand each other.

He frowned. "I do not resent you."

"You've resented me since the day Benedict gave me to you," I corrected him, hastily tacking on, "as a student," before he got the wrong impression. "I've always thought perhaps that you resented me because I was possibly the child of Benedict's that you always wanted to be."

"That is not it."

It was rather like talking to a wall, and about as illuminating. Still, I think I was right. But I don't think even he understands why he feels the way he does. So I pressed onwards. "You treat Moira differently than myself. You teach her, rather than simply trying to beat her." I smiled wryly, remembering the bruises I had received from Jerrym.

"Moira wants to learn," Jerrym stared down at me, his gaze even. "She asked to train with me. You never wanted to learn."

"I was ignorant of the customs when I arrived." My chin slid up a notch. "And you didn't tell me the rules until after I had done something wrong."

He was silent then, and I know he knew I was right about that.

"I had never practiced regularly at dawn before," I admitted. "I practiced when I could, where I could. Daybreak didn't matter."

Jerrym almost smiled. "You practice at dawn, then you have the rest of the day for other things."

"Like more practice," I teased.

"Like more practice."

I smiled, relaxing as we danced. "We could try getting along," I suggested.

"You are not in Amber," he reminded me.

"True." I didn't want to get into that argument again. Not when we were doing so well. "But when I visit, we could call a truce. No more arguments."

"We could try."

"And perhaps we could even practice together?" I suggested with a smile.

"I don't know if I'll have time. Between Moira, and my father..."

I stared at him, trying to understand his expression. Was it an excuse, or was he actually being apologetic? "We needn't practice at dawn," I murmured. "There is always afternoon. Or even the night." I couldn't resist a teasing smile. "We could practice at night, for swordplay in the dark."

"Late night lessons?" he teased in return.

The light didn't reach his eyes, and I knew it was only social flirtation that Flora had drilled home once upon a time, but I felt my heart skip anyway. For the first time we were speaking, and there was no argument brewing. Only two people engaged in simple flirtation. It was enough for now. I have a hope that at least we might someday be friends.

As the dance ended, Jerrym bowed formally, and I returned a formal curtsey. As we went our separate ways, I had to smile to myself. Several minutes, as close to alone as it gets in a public forum, and no arguments. I was pleased, and hopeful.

Sebastian found me then, and swept me out onto the dance floor. "Your friend seems to think I plan to compromise your honor," he smiled down at me.

"Do you?" I asked, an innocent smile on my face.

His words shivered through me. "I must admit, I find you attractive. But I will make no move unless you do so first."

"I see," I murmured. It sounded as if he had considered it. As had I. Would it gain me anything, or only put me into a worse position than I already was? A part of me wanted desperately to give in, but I said nothing, knowing I should think it through.

I danced once more with Benedict, and then Sebastian decided it was time to depart. We arrived back in our ways, and I had barely managed to remove myself from the evening's trappings when I felt the tickling of a Trump call.

I made certain I was decent, and I answered sleepily. "Yes?"

It was Ardath, bright eyed and well-rested. I yawned as I stepped through.

"Did you tell Samuel to make a pass at me?"

I was confused. "No. That was his idea. But I didn't discourage him." I tried to smile. "I take it you didn't like the idea."

She shook her head. We talked for a while. I think she plans to visit soon, and I think that somewhere in her mind she has the same ideas I do about Sebastian... but still wondering where it would get me. Or her. If not in worse trouble than already.

And when the conversation completed, I stumbled back through a Trump to Samuel, and into bed... for sleep.